Chow Look-alike Meter

MyHeritage: Look-alike Meter - Lost relatives - Descendants

parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme

This was one of my first favourite songs.. I just discovered the singer and title to it while watching The Wonder Years yesterday night with baby.. personally I think it's a great song.. deep in meaning and musically beautiful

helping you helping me

A week ago I finally gave up writing to law firms in the UK bugging them to give me politely asking them if they have any long term internship or just a spot in their office to help out with whatever crap work they needed me to do - FREE of charge!!

Yes.. nobody wants me for FREE..

I was feeling really quite pathetic after 3 months but honestly I do understand that no one (unless under orders) would want to be in charge of a 22 year old taking up space in their office and wasting precious forms/papers in the name of 'helping'..

Unfortunately, I am not going to make a very good lawyer if nobody wants to take me in and I am not even going to be able to practice if no one wants to offer me a training contract..

I have come to realise that in the UK, there are so many good and reputable law schools that having an external degree really doesn't help..

I was in my Volunteer Advisor's office yesterday and she helped me call the Richmond Legal Advice Centre to ask if they would take me in even though I'm just a student and wouldn't be able to give proper legal advice..

The man over the other side of the phone sounded really keen and he said he wouldn't mind taking me in to help out with general things and to let me take notes and observed..

I couldn't believe it! My heart literally leaped with joy! Finally... after 3 months of searching.. some real legal experience here..

However, that was quite short lived.. he later asked my volunteer advisor which university I am with and when she told him I'm with the UoL External.. he wasn't so keen anymore :(

This post is not supposed to be defamatory in any way to the external course which I think is highly regarded in Malaysia but somehow I am having trouble promoting it over here..

Maybe it’s just because my grades aren't very good :P

Hmm.. anyhow, there might still be a chance that the man from the legal centre will get back to me (please, please please do...) or maybe I should give him a call tomorrow and push him into giving me a space there :P

Heh..

Afterall in the real world, we can't wait to be handed..

The good news is that I have an interview with the 'Good Neighbours' tomorrow and with some luck they will take me in and let me help some elderly people here..

Richmond does after all have a high percentage of elderly people compared to other parts of London..

It's quite cool seeing old women riding around town with their 'scooters' honking at oblivious young people standing in their way..

Wei Chieh loves imitating them and having a laugh..

I have never posted any pictures on Richmond but this place is heavenly!

We live just 5 minutes walk from the River Thames (the calmer, clearer part not the muddy side as in Westminster) and this place has a small town feel to it..

The wonders of Richmond is never ending – Richmond Park which has acres and acres of green (I believe it is the largest park in London) is just a 15 minute walk uphill from where we stay and you get the most fantastic views from Richmond Hill which overlooks the River Thames..

Here are pictures.. and they will say it all..

The view of the River Thames from Richmond Hill

This picture of the River Thames was taken from the river banks heading towards Petersham and Ham.

In the summer where days are long and the sun is out until 9p.m it is great to walk along the river with baby after dinner or just to sit on one of the benches along it, holding his hand and soaking in on all the beauty..

What more can a girl ask for? = )

bright eyes

I haven't been listening to many new songs these days and this song certainly isn't 'new' but it is one of my more current musical discoveries..

It is sad (as usual) given my musical tastes but I enjoy it.. not only because there're bunnies in the video but because it is a very good song..

If you like it it's worth watching the movie as well - Watership Down - and perhaps venturing on to the book later on (I've yet to read it myself).. apparently it's a classic children's book from the 70's written by British writer Richard Adams..

re-living the past

Last weekend I did my 'weekly calls' to my parents.. just to catch up and let them know that I am fine..

Everything was okay until my dad told me something I never expected to hear

'Your brother have been very lazy lately, maybe you should advise and encourage him to study harder.... He didn't do too well in his last exam (he got No. 30 in the entire standard which is a drop of 15 runks from last year's results)..... I asked him for his report card repeatedly but he kept telling me that he hasn't got it.. Later, when your mummy asked him, he told her that he signed the card himself and returned it already.'

I was really really shocked to hear that..

Shocked not because I didn't expect my brother to be dishonest

Shocked because I did exactly the same thing 13 years ago..

It is very difficult for my father to understand why a 10 year old will do such a thing..

It is very difficult for me to understand as well..

I didn't know what to tell my dad.. what was more disappointing to me was that my dad don't remember me ever being like that..

He remembers me as being a difficult kid to raise but he doesn't remember me hiding exam papers from him.. changing my marks.. copying his signature to satisfy the demands of my teachers for a signed exam paper indicating my parents' knowledge of my marks and so on..

At least my brother only had 1 paper to alter, I had numerous

I remember most clearly the Maths paper I got 95% which I hid and lied about.. My mum found it in my art file while I was bathing one evening.. she rushed out to the shop and got a cane immediately..

It wasn't that I was being naughty or that I enjoyed lying.. My father demanded nothing less than 100% for Maths because to him it was either you know it or you didn't.. he doesn't tolerate silly mistakes..

It is very painful to remember such things..

The hurt and guilt I go through month after month hiding exam papers from them, not knowing when they'll find them..

Knowing that if my mum happens to stumble across my 'hiding corner' they would cane and hate me for god knows how long..

I lived like that for almost 7 years..

I became depressed.. I became suicidal.. but that is my story.. it doesn't mean so much anymore because I am now in a different place with someone I trust and love unconditionally..

What I am more concerned about is my brother.. I do not want him to fall into the same trap..

7 years to live in total darkness without trusting any love or care is very very very very long..

I remember once when I was 13 I asked a friend - what do you think it feels like to faint?

It seems rather childish but that was the way I wanted to feel.. I wanted to feel as if I didn't exist, as if I didn't know anything, like the world was dark and nothing else was there.. I wanted to forget and evaporate into thin air..

I wanted to be in a coma forever..

I always felt like my brother would be luckier, that he is wanted, unlike me, I never felt like I was wanted, I was always the burden they had to carry..

I didn't tell my dad all of that last week, but I did tell him half my story.. because, as much as he had caused me pain, I am sure telling him everything would cause him more pain than necessary..

My only hope is that he remembers and not make the same mistake with my brother..

I know he tries to be a good father, he tries to over-provide but he is asking too much from us too early on.. I don't blame him, his own father was probably very hard on him too..

But sometimes I wish I didn't have to live with a nightmarish childhood like that, a nightmare my parents were oblivious to, a nightmare that is going to take me a lifetime to mend

Sorting bins

Last weekend was really hectic..

I had 9.30 - 7 on Saturday and 9.30 - 3.30 on Sunday attending lectures..

Weekend lectures?

Yes, weekend lectures - unfortunately that is what being an independent student is like..

Okay, first off perhaps I should explain a bit the nature of my degree..

I am doing my 2nd year LLB (or as the University calls it - Finals Part I) in London. I am not however, linked directly to any universities. I am an external student of the University of London (which means my degree follows their structure and course material, exams are also set and marked by them and degree awarded by them) but other than that I do not attend any daily lectures and so on..

'Wow.. sounds like fun' - you say..

Yes, I'd hate to admit it but having not to attend daily lectures and worry about course work, assignments and prejudiced lecturers is really quite fun but as we all know it comes with a price - having to instill a lot of self-discipline..

Sadly, I am definitely no where near a 'disciplined' person (I try...... ) and yes, I am still trying.. but that is another matter..

The University of London (UOL) does however organise weekend lectures for those who choose to attend (and pay.. heh)..

The lectures are divided to 4 very crammed weekends and is optional..

Some UOL LLB students choose to attend daily lectures in specified colleges around the world (they get the same course material and everything but the local college provides additional guidance and so on..)

Exams are still set and marked by the UOL..

What is killing about the UOL external LLB is essentially the exams.. we have no course work or assignments so in essence, the quality of our degree is fully reflected by our examination marks..

Having explained that, back to the weekend courses..

The main asset of a lecture (as far as I am concerned) is the lecturer.. If the main asset is a bad asset I wouldn't think it would be capable of producing another good products (the students)..

That said, the UOL definitely have very good assets..

I have very rarely enjoyed classes back in school but I must say last weekend was great..

It was informative and productive.. the lecturers were dedicated, they understood what we wanted, what we needed and they delivered.. I am now much more informed and motivated..

To me, what is sad is thinking back on the state of our universities back in Malaysia..

Of course, I can't speak for all the lecturers and universities in Malaysia..

But the one I was in for a month told me a lot (lets not put names in case they decide to sue me for sedition)..

The lecturers were not motivated (coming in late, going out early, constantly avoiding questions they can't answer, lack of explanation, summarised notes with a lack of comprehensive reading material), they didn't do much case research (reflected very much by their incapability to pronounce case names correctly and also their incapability to distinguish parties in cases)..

Certainly there are a huge load of case law in every subject but being a lecturer and the particular case being a landmark case.. I would certainly have hoped that my lecturer would know more than what she did..

It is really a shame..

If only those lecturers had the chance to attend the weekend course like I did.. they would certainly be shamed to death..

What I pity the most are fellow friends who are still stuck in the public universities back home..

At least I got the chance to escape.. at least I get the chance to see that there are people who are actually dedicated to what they are doing.. People with motivation.. people who think..

Having been public schooled most of my life, I have no faith in it.. I know ex-classmates who are now training to be teachers (future educators to my children) and I have no faith in them either..

You see rotten students being pulled into the education sector simply because it pays fairly well and it is taken cared for by the government.. I just can't explain how horrible the full picture is.. it is a crumbling pyramid..

Yes, there have been a few really great teachers.. teachers whom I admire for having the dedication to stick with a failing system for the love of teaching.. but the numbers are falling drastically..

It is really not an ideal situation.. and I don't intend to be mugged into it any further than I already had..

gloomy days

Very very tempted to do my kiddy rants.. but no.. this blog doesn't serve that purpose.. must perservere.. MUST perservere!!

I have news..

Our landlord have just given us notice to move :'(

Its a very sad time for all of us.. I don't think any outsiders will understand but those who have been to our home, lived with us, had dinner with us will understand our attachment to our flat..

The day we got the notice, it was really sad and gloomy.. Ken was sitting around the living room looking rather helpless..

We are looking for a new place to move into.. which might work out in our favour really.. but yes, we are all so attached to this place.. it is not easy to move on..

I love everything about it.. I love the lift.. I love our room.. I love the hall.. I love the kitchen.. I love the toilet.. I love my windows.. I love the view..

Forgive me for the lack of blogging..

I wanted to blog about Justina's weekend at our place but I have been too busy dealing with the University over some weekend course class clash matters and also the meeting on Monday..

Also, I have been over at baby Luciano's quite a bit these days..

He's such a cutiepie..

But I really wish he would sleep and wake at the right time.. Cheeky monkey!

Oh..

Our tulips are starting to bud..

You can see small little green stems coming out of their pot..

Sigh..

Perhaps time will carry me along and I will recover from this gloom.. I shall be back soon with what I intended to put up here..

Firsts

Okie pokie..

Not new to this blogging thing.. but I am new to blogspot..

Unfortunately, my blog of almost 4 years - of the same title - doesn't serve its purpose that well anymore..

There are many reasons why this blog now exists;

For one, reading the law have made me mega-paranoid about all the invasion to privacy stuff not to mention the constant suing and bitching going on around us..

For a second, I am holding a post in the External Laws Committee with the University of London and do not wish for all my childish material (albeit, fond memories of my teenage years) to fall into the wrong hands (I do not think the University for one, will appreciate it)..

And now that I am 21 and venturing into semi-adulthood, it is here to detail the better part of knowledge (mainly of the law, cookery, job adventures, travels and human relationships) rather than kiddy rants..

It is a more positive ranting outlet I guess :P

Although, I am still not very sure if the whole thing will work out really.. hehe..

The old blog stays alive - for close friends in which it existed for in the first place = )

Cheers!